I’m not wallowing in self pity here I’m just trying to let people understand a bit about me as a person before any advice etc is given…

I’m 27, single parent of 6 year old twins (father sees them maybe once every month) & a 1 year old (father has zero involvement)..

I’ve always been the ‘bigger’ one out of friends, although when I look back on pictures I wasn’t actually fat like they used to call me?! I was bullied all through my school years & as much as I love my father he was a very strict father with high expectations in everything I done which didn’t help me in anyway – because of all this I have never ‘felt good enough’ have had no self esteem, lack in confidence & I put on this almighty confident front, somehow?!

I’m fed up of having no self worth, thinking im not good enough, ive had 27years of this but in those 27 years I havnt helped myself, food has been my only comfort, my only control, the one thing ive been able to do & not felt like ive been letting it down – lol can’t believe how silly that sounds but it’s true. I NEED to feel better about myself but in my 23 stone body, I’m never going to feel that way & I need to gain my confidence back … I have a heart of gold, & deep down I think I have a lot to give to people, friends, family etc but I cant see past my fat!!!

I am lazy now though, I am full of motivation for a week & I then lose it, it all becomes too ‘hard’ to exercise everyday when the 3 kids go to bed – what a lame excuse.

any advise on exercises I can do, ways to motivate myself etc anything at all would be greatly appreciated